But not today, dear reader. Today it was glorious, resplendent, and zen.
I know I said was taking a blogging break, incidentally, and I am. Don't worry, I won't say anything of consequence here, making this ineligible to count as an actual post.
It's just that I have to tell someone what happened to me today before it eats a hole in my brain!
I went for a run in the desert and what did I come across but a tiny green snake. A tiny green snake with an underbelly of bright, candy orange!
Dear reader, why did I not catch him? Why?
I've seen so many snakes out in the desert, but never one like this. What are the odds I'll ever see him again?
This is what's going to keep me up tonight...thinking about that snake, how easily I could have scooped him up. He was a safe one, I know he was. I could have brought him home and showed the girls. I could have released him into my backyard, don't you think? So many bugs wandering around out there. Or I could have taken him back to the desert.
In the moment, though...I got stuck thinking how happy he must have been right where he was, on such a beautiful spring day. Even with his tiny brain, I knew he was perfectly content. And I couldn't bear to mess with that.
But I'm never going to get over this. Just like I'll never get over wishing I'd whipped off my t-shirt and captured that enormous blue bee.
That was almost a year ago and it plagues me to this day.
Though I will tell you, from having captured that black bee the other day...I would've had quite the fight on my hands. Those bees do not go down easily.
Darn me and my insipid respect for life! Darn me and my conflicted moral dilemmas!
At any rate...there's magic out in that desert, I'm telling you. It buzzes and hums with the energy sucked from the souls of all those who pass through it. The cairns come and go...they make me happy when they appear and lonely when they disappear. There's still water in the creek and soon there will be tadpoles. There were lizards sunning on rocks and scuttling along my path. I saw tiny butterflies, huge black beetles doing handstands in the dirt, and a hawk circling overhead.
I take back what I said about the desert being too cool to celebrate spring. Today it was filled with so much life, such beauty, bursts of color, and wonderful smells.
Oh, and a dead bat. He was mashed so flat on the road I nearly missed him. I've been thinking about bats a lot lately, how tiny and perfect they are, and it made me very sad to see this one a mere tuft of fur embedded in the pavement.